The Lincstation N2 has 16GB LPDDR5 (Non-upgradeable), so 16GB it is. I already use CPU type host, and the i440fx is a click, click, next mistake, ha ha 🙂 . But for my test setup it's good enough and i didn't feel the need to change it, because it works. But I will use Q35 in my final setup.
Truenas is also improving the VM engine and will become more and more a virtualisation platform. But for now the sweetspot of HexOs / Truenas is still good and reliable network storage. Proxmox gives me a lot of flexibility and is my virtualisation platform of choice. In the past I used ESXi, but since the Broadcom takeover I moved to Proxmox. vCenter was a nice tool and Proxmox is developing something like that:
https://pve.proxmox.com/wiki/Proxmox_Datacenter_Manager_Roadmap
Are you still using Proxmox? Or did you fully move to HexOs/Truenas? I am also curious about what you are using as server hardware.